Wednesday, December 2, 2009

My Rules for Riding on Public Transportation

When riding any form of mass transportation there are unwritten rules:

1) Keep your eyes to yourself. ( I find a book helpful here)

2) Don't sit on a seat that is facing backwards. (Just weird)

3) Keep a straight face. (This applies specifically to situations when someone sits near you who hasn't showered but has tried to hid the stench with cheap perfume)

4) Don't sit next to anyone unless you can't find another empty seat. (This rules is an important one)

5) Ignore people acting strangely, crying children, and stupid schoolchildren without parental supervision. (It just feeds the insanity).

6) Be conscious of the elderly and offer them you seat. (this is just good manners even though most people don't do this.)


  1. Question: What is the correct etiquette when rules 2 and 4 conflict? If the only seats left are one facing backward and one facing forward beside another person, which rule takes precedence?

  2. And what if you're forced to sit next to someone who has completely drenched themselves in cheap perfume so that it is no longer just body odor but a cloud of toxic gas? I don't think even a book would be able to help you school your expression then.

  3. I don't do public transportation because it's public, and therefore, smelly.